Archive for the ‘Hulk’ Category

Up, Up and Straight Up My Ass – Hulk: HULK SMASH EXPECTATIONS

June 2, 2007

Cheesy 70s special effects, assemble!

I’ll put this up front: I’m much more of a Marvel person, I think, than a DC person. Not quite sure why that is. Maybe the “iconic” image DC cloaks itself with chaffs me too much. Yeah, 70+ years of history is impressive, but you still don’t really have anything on a monthly basis I’d care to read. There’s just something a little more compelling about the “real world” type of flavor Marvel has, which I admit is a strange thing to say about a universe where a giant man wants to munch on your planet and one of the most powerful superheroes communicates with squirrels. But that’s how I feel. It also has characters I feel have incredibly compelling stories to them. One of my absolute favorites as far back as I can remember has been The Incredible Hulk.

I can’t tell you why I like the Hulk so much. I’ve never really been taken in by his comic books. The biggest exposure I’ve really had to him was his syndicated mid-90s cartoon. Something about the duality of an intelligent, weak science geek and an unstoppable, baby-minded giant is appealing. LOL WISH FULFILLMENT. So imagine my interest when Marvel and Universal Studios began working on Hulk, the live action picture. Not only had they gone an intriguing route in hustling Ang Lee to direct it, but one of my biggest celebrity crushes, Jennifer Connelly, was tapped to play the tragic love interest. The only way they could’ve stopped me from rushing into the theater and ordering the ticket seller, mouth frothing, to give me a pass to see Hulk would have been to have the movie be two hours of Stan Lee shitting on the camera lens. As it turned out, it took considerably less to dampen my enthusiasm.

The movie premiered to bewildered and frustrated disappointment. I was crushed. This should’ve been awesome! Incredible, even! What went wrong? I wanted to know, but the backlash against the film kept me wary until late into its theatrical run. I took a deep breath, bought a ticket and waited patiently in the darkness of the theater for my medicine. As soon as the film started, my expectations rose again. Danny Elfman’s aural ministrations pleased my ears while experimental, cloudy, twirling imagery acted out the psychological struggle of Bruce Banner. Those guys didn’t know what they were talking about! This was really cool and artsy! Then we were informed that the projector had been malfunctioning and we were all given free vouchers to come back again. [insert wacky sound effect] It was a setback for morale, that was for sure. But this time, I was absolutely determined to see it for myself. I went again at the earliest convenience and strapped myself in for Hulk. Little did I know just what Ang Lee had planned for me. This can only mean another edition of…