Archive for the ‘Muir Freeland’ Category

Final Fantasy VI: On the John (Mora?)

August 7, 2007

Final Fantasy VI Advance (Section A)

Final Fantasy VI, which many will fondly remember as Final Fantasy III from the SNES days, is considered by many to be the pinnacle of the series. It was created in a time when developers were finally beginning to understand the importance of intricate characterization, and shortly before the time when Tetsuya Nomura would reduce that characterization to angsty, zipper-laden fetishism. It was also the first Final Fantasy to take place outside of the generic fantasy setting that most RPGs of the time were fellating; someone at Square had finally made the stunning deduction that Elfland was the worst fucking idea for an RPG town ever, and you can feel Final Fantasy VI whispering its apologies with every factory, military base, and industrial mining town on its world map. A world map which would be, in the latter half of the game, completely broken open for the player to explore in whatever manner they saw fit. It’s no wonder Final Fantasy VI is remembered as a revolutionary piece of game design; if nothing else, it was created with a genuine understanding that RPGs, as a genre, should evolve.

Final Fantasy VI Advance


Pretty Fucking Aptly Named (Damn, that wasn’t even funny when this game first came out)

May 7, 2007

Hi. I’m BZ. I contribute. You might be wondering where I fit in on the “good cop/bad cop” nonsense that Mora and Magus have been spreading. If so, you’re a fucking idiot. I’m not a cop. I’m an asshole. Professionally.

Portrait of Ruin is a hideous abortion of a Castlevania game. It suffers from a critical lack of attention to detail: tiles and monsters are recycled unchanged from previous titles, levels and monsters accomplish almost nothing in providing gameplay, and protagonists have their names misspelled in the menu screen. It’s the kind of game that could’ve used another year in development, perhaps with a producer who wasn’t fresh out of ideas. Barring that, it’s the kind of game that could’ve benefited from just a little bit of love: it’s obvious through and through that no one at Konami cared about the product they were creating.

Slash slash slash blargh